do you believe i erroneously judged your engagement with me on the matters of sexism as disingenuous?
initially yes, i was being serious in wanting to know what you perceived as sexist in me (i by no means claimed at that point to not be sexist or to have been wanting to clear my name of sexism, you assumed those things about me)
at some point early on in the sexism thread i wrote the whole thing off as doomed and unproductive, so by that point, you wouldve been correct to presume my participation as disingenuous
this post suggests otherwise. do you mean to say that you didn't have those feelings prior to the sexism thread?
im not seeing the contradiction you're seeing
as in i dont even know where to look
all i know is youre suggesting some kind of contradiction between those two posts and im not seeing it
in short, how do you arrive at a place where you think in an isolated instance (you speaking at me in the moment with regards to sexism and my claim that you were being sexist) was in good faith when you already believed in an inability to have such serious and respectable discussions on the site.
do you think i could not correctly identify this propensity in your perspective?
i believed it was possible to resolve the thing i wanted to resolve in the first place, "what does nyte perceive about my posting that's sexist"
i do not believe its possible in the general sense to maintain threads that stay serious and get consistently productive discussion out of them / i did not believe in the general project of the sexism thread being able to reform the people on this site perceived by you as sexist
but i mean that second stance is more a rationalization of my more fundamental belief that hiding posts and forcefully policing the course of discussion is more trouble than its worth and unlikely to actually achieve the goal of creating productive (i.e., changing peoples minds, resolving conflicts) discussion
did you ask yourself if you might be doing something amoral or harming of others if your behaviors could be seen as sexist?
no and ive never claimed not to be amoral
can you see why i would feel you had disingenuous motivations from the get go, then?
sure
still wouldve gone smoother if you expressed that directly rather than with leading questions and ambiguous rhetoric
i believe i did directly say that you were being disingenuous or that it was not made in good faith and you argued otherwise.
also, it should be noted that what i am getting at here, is that you vilified me for not addressing you.
you vilified the whole thread and endeavor as being in bad taste and bad faith.
you are a large part of the reason that kyle decided to wield whatever bullshit power he wanted to throw around as justicar
what measure are you considering to get to the conclusion that the thread is not worth believing in? How many users must have reformed for it to be considered a successful measure and what kind of reform are you considering?
in my mind almost everything here 'doesn't matter' and by that measure, if one person is changed by that thread and by changed i dont mean full reform i mean like simply thinks there's some credibility to nytes words against them and considers her suggestions, then that thread seems successful to me. it will have done more good in the big picture than most of the other shit on here in my mind
of course its up to nyte to figure out whether she thinks its worth her time or if there's a better way to go about it, but I'm not gonna say I dont believe in her or her ability to lead people to reform a piece of themselves when there might be one person who reads the thread and gets something 'positive' out of it. She might luck out and make a really good appeal to someone or actually change someones mind but theyre just too embarassed to admit it so you dont see it. im just saying that i dont think you or I can really predict whether that does or doesnt happen
these were my first two posts int he blog thread asking nyte to elaborate
i didnt intend to project "if you just tell me what im doing wrong i will reform and become not sexist" though somewhere along the line, as frustration mounted, that somehow got implied...?
anyway i dont think i misrepresented my own intentions at all in the beginning
can you elaborate on why this pertains specifically to the sexism thread?
and i am simply saying your intention was disingenuous. you were not interested in the right or wrong treatment of others. just "praxis"
well i dont fundamentally agree that your ideas of right and wrong treatment of others are correct and youve never spelled it out enough to be able to discuss the point
the whole premise of serious threads existing and people being expected to respect the seriousness of those threads seems questionable to me with this site culture
i dont think kyle should've done any mod action in that thread at all, and i don't think there shouldve been an expectation for him to
because its all more trouble than its worth and essentially sped up the site blowing up to the state its in now
basically my stance is "if the methods taken to reform the site make it a less enjoyable place for me to visit then there was probably something misguided with execution somewhere along the line" and im deciding that the idea of serious threads existing at all was part of the issue