Great show
Save it for somebody else.
Maybe if you weren't such a dumb bitch you wouldn't have done this THREE TIMES
Did you choose to latch onto this personal drama of yours that happened six years ago because you don't want to think about your other more troublesome personal drama?
Give it a rest man. Don't be such a damned fool. Forgive and forget.
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I mean, for Pete's sake.
Just let go.
uh oh the whamen social shaming their ulty witness
if any of this were real (empathy, compassion, seeking to understand blah blah blah) you would have left it to PMs. it's that simple.
THREE TIMES LMAO
First of all good morning or afternoon and happy cinco de mayo. I'd ask if you feel better after taking the time to write this up, but I get the feeling you feel worse. If there's one commonality that runs through our history of time spent on much better terms, its consistently being unwilling or unable to acknowledge my reality and meet me halfway.
I'm going to break this down carefully to respect the time spent composing it. To start although I feel I've been consistent in all mediums as to my main motivations when responding to you in particular publicly or privately, I want to be clear that I don't doubt the things you expressed in this are true for you. Meaning that you feel I am a lying, petty, narcissist, who doxxed you. That I ignore you, invalidate your feelings/reality, that I only exist here today with intent to harass and publicly shame you. That doesn't mean I agree with those claims, but I cannot dispute you feeling they are true.
Now in order for me to dispute those claims I could go through a much longer storytime of times I feel exemplify my consistency in message and effort, citing either verbatim words I told you or more anecdotal evidence. I don't think you would care much for that route, as I firmly believe everyone is guilty of cringeworthy exchanges in private with their significant other or partner. I could just say "thats not true, its false, made up", but that isn't very convincing and it gets us nowhere. Instead I'm going with the third option which is to try and assume everything you've stated is true.
To start let's discuss doxxing, you feel my adherence to the importance as to what the term means is "splitting hairs" and an unimportant aspect to continue to point to. Then if "no one wants me here" and I have "doxxed you" then I should be banned, no questions asked. No one wants me here as you stated a few times, and I doxxed, it sounds like an open and shut case. I am not banned, and if you want to flag down a moderator or @SOPHIE to rectify that lets do it. If you were to tell someone who has no context of the situation that I doxxed you, they would not assume I simply aired some drama publically. They would rightly assume I posted your full government name, address(es), phone number, current or past employers with intent to send harassment your way. It's actually illegal in some jurisdictions, so yes, it is important to understand the difference. Was what I said shitty, uncouth, in poor taste? Abso-fucking-lutely, I don't agree with the way in which I shared a slice of my reality at all, but I don't want to act like it didn't happen. If you are insistent on keeping this as a core argument , you should accuse me of some more heinous crimes while you're at it, since the meanings can be whatever you want them to be that day.
Moving on from there we get to the accusation that I'm pretending to care, am a narcissist and i'm beyond petty who feels owed something. What exactly is benefit to maintaining a thin appearance of caring about you, the person, with regards to the current state of things? I don't want to outright dismiss the claim as just another fudging of the definition of a narcissist, so instead I'm going to try get the label to fit. Working within your framing, narcissistic people are often unable to understand, or care for others or their feelings. (A lack of empathy) Meaning, upkeeping the alleged facade is important to maintain the illusion I am not NPD. Another core trait would be seeking praise, or admiration from others to sate my grandiose image of self. So perhaps I'd be exploiting this drama, to manipulate the court of public opinion to praise me?
Where this falls apart pretty quickly for me is that I feel the most important aspect isn't praise, its being true to myself and doing what I feel aligns with that even when it makes me look bad. I didn't express a desire for you to "worship me" and I was fairly explicit countless times that you don't owe me for things I felt were worth doing at the time. I often prioritized you over myself, not because I felt you were better than me but because it felt like with how rough things were you needed the extra boost. Reminders that I was there, in your corner, cheering you on. From ensuring you had the things you needed to get through the day or week, smaller considerate actions to make a shit day in a shit year less well... shitty. (even if just for a moment) Perhaps they didn't always hit the mark or have the intended effect. I still considered any resources spent in pursuit of that goal a gift unless discussed beforehand, (i.e. horse meds for work, not your horses) and never asked for restitution outside of those. To me my care was shown trying to be there for you everyday, if I was needed I would try to drop everything, I wanted to encourage you to push through, and try my best to maintain open honesty in my communications even when it wasn't easy to do so.
Lastly for now I'll try to tackle the claim that your feelings have been and always were clear and blunt. Though I just choose to not hear them, acknowledge them or respect them. This one I feel is the one that personally runs deepest for you of those mentioned, as it was perhaps the most common pain point in any discourse surrounding the relationship or "us". I feel you haven't been able to hear what I'm saying or have been since a month or two after we exchanged goodbyes at the airport. That where you wanted things to go, how you felt about us was important to me in understanding not only your perspective but where I stood. In terms of the fallout and now it's about understanding why you can assert so confidently that it was never avoided or unclear. What was real, what wasn't why you would want me back, ask if my relationship is an open one, or say you wished we had talked it out.
When I had gotten to the point of feeling like despite my efforts I was forcing the issue and exerting a lot of pressure to do so. I asked to talk for almost a year about this stuff, when you would say you can't or its too much for you in your current state. I would ask you to let me know when it's a better time, a better day and that I would make time to accommodate you. That talk never came and the whole time you were wishing I had done this, or understood thing you never expressed but felt should be implied.... We could have still had that talk, instead even though I continued to encourage/support and care for you. It felt like it became easier to box it all up, label it fake and put it up on a high shelf. It doesn't make sense to me, it never did. I couldn't even out the equation of being someone you wanted in your life, but didn't seem to value as an equal or partner. Someone that was so self centered, uncaring, fake, manipulative and so on. My problem has always been trying to prove you right, looking for where I am all those things and more.
You often cited your longer relationship resume, as evidence that you knew better than me. That my opinion on how things should be dealt with or addressed was naive, foolish, or immature. That it was somehow better to have an argument and wake up the next day like it never happened. I didn't get much sleep those nights, not sure how you didn't have as much trouble. I feel like the real sadness in all of this, is that you've mistaken experience for wisdom and instead of counting relationships you should've noticed a lack of healthy ones. The best player of a game is rarely the one who has played the most games, but the one who never stopped studying it and improving themselves.
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Why would you need to post this when most people here already know all of these things about her? This is where your entire understanding of the situation crumbles.
Just give it up. A normal person wouldn't come to a place where his ex hangs out with her friends and starts berating her.
The Simp army has logged on to Event_Horizon
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Greeting and Context: Wishes happy Cinco de Mayo, acknowledges recipient's effort in writing, senses they feel worse.
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Core Issue: Highlights a pattern of not acknowledging the writer's reality or meeting halfway.
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Response Approach: Aims to respect the recipient's feelings without fully agreeing, avoids lengthy counterarguments or dismissal, assumes recipient's claims are true for discussion.
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Doxxing Accusation:
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Recipient feels the writer doxxed them and should be banned.
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Writer disputes the term's use, clarifies doxxing involves sharing sensitive personal info (e.g., name, address) with harmful intent, which they deny.
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Admits sharing drama publicly was in poor taste but not doxxing; open to moderator review.
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Narcissism and Pettiness Claims:
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Recipient labels writer as narcissistic, petty, and pretending to care.
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Writer questions the benefit of faking care, argues narcissistic traits (e.g., lack of empathy, seeking praise) don’t align with their actions.
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Emphasizes consistent care (e.g., prioritizing recipient’s needs, providing support) without expecting repayment, framing it as genuine.
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Ignoring Feelings:
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Recipient claims their feelings were clear but ignored.
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Writer feels they sought open communication, but recipient avoided discussions, leaving issues unresolved.
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Notes recipient’s mixed signals (e.g., wanting writer back) and unexpressed expectations caused confusion.
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Relationship Dynamics:
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Writer feels dismissed as naive due to less relationship experience.
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Argues recipient equates experience with wisdom, overlooking unhealthy patterns.
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Suggests true growth comes from self-improvement, not just more relationships.
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Colonel nmaGane of the 711st Nyte Defense Brigade.
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Absolutely nuts.
Do you think Jones, who has consistent done and said supposedly much worse things than you, is banned from this forum? The moderators don't care, you know this and are again saying this in complete bad faith or you're insane and delusional.
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nmaGane's relationship with nyte is specifically one side opened.
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[nmaGane, nyte)