My brother âJohnâ married âKimâ last year. She is a perfectly nice woman, but we donât have much in common and arenât close. At the wedding, her mother got catastrophically drunk, sexually harassed the best man, and then got into a fight with the best manâs wife (a bridesmaid). The next morning, when the best man quietly moved tables so he wouldnât have to sit with her, she screamed at him for âshamingâ her and tried to stab him with a fork. No one on the brideâs side blinked an eye. The rest of us assumed they were just trying to salvage the rest of the day by keeping the peace, but when my brother asked Kim about it later, she said the best man shouldnât have âflirtedâ with her mom and then âacted coyâ afterward just because his wife found out. Thatâs ⌠not what happened. We all saw her mother get out of control in front of everyone.
John said to let it go because weddings can get emotional. But then the same thing sort of happened at Christmas when Kim invited us all to their house for a party. This time, her mother tried to set fire to my motherâs dress, supposedly for flirting with her boyfriend. Kim said that it was my motherâs fault for being too friendly and that her mother had been cheated on a lot. John said that Kim knew her mother was in the wrong but was just really defensive of her. Now Kim has invited everyone to a birthday barbecue for my brother next month. We donât want to go, but we also donât want to skip my brotherâs party. Every family has a difficult member (we have an uncle who gets drunk and angry if you wonât let him drive), but Kimâs mother actually tries to hurt people, both drunk and sober. How can we handle this? Not go? Go and do something if Kimâs mother gets upset again? (I wanted to call the police at Christmas, but Mom is worried that will alienate Kim and John. His best friend, the best man at the wedding, has already stopped talking to him because of the wedding day incident, which actually probably could have qualified as sexual assault if heâd wanted to push it, never mind his wifeâs black eye.)
Agubar - scumlean
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