I'll be the first on the forum to admit it -- I'm a midwit. I have misrepresented myself as an intellectuel in multiple threads and it has caused significant emotionel grief.
So I admit it -- I'm a midwit.
Let's use this thread as a space to explore how I'm a midwit and maybe other people on the forum can open up on the forum about it.
I too am a midwit. And I too am not so smart about most things even though I thought I was.
I'm definitely a dumbass, very mid as fuck at everything from dota to work. Like better than average but like a 5k shitter, you know people who don't know shit about fuck will say oh you're so smart but when you actually hang around really hard working and smart people you just get embarrassed at seeing how big the gap is, like seeing a pro streamer play and you realize I will never micro as good as that guy, or ever be able to analyze and see the game like those pros do, always be like 5 steps behind and getting farmed by the people who are actually good while they laugh at you for being a failure and realize yea I deserve everything in my life because all I will ever be is mid as fuck.
Like same with women, work, everything, doesn't mean I will be like poor or anything then I also realize I have too big of an ego. Most likely due to how I was raised. My dad had a big chip on his shoulder, he pushed that onto me, so I have this shitty personality of sometimes trying to 1 up people like maybe I'm doing that right now like you think you're mediocre? I'm way more closer to mediocre than you are, but still better than you at being mid.
I feel like there's nothing to look forward to. Won't die single but won't ever be with a woman I really love or feel attracted to, I really just wish I could be happy with that, with my situation. Instead I am just hating everything all the time and embarrassed to be alive or be seen by people becaude I always thought I'd be doing something more important or impactful. I always thought I had the capability to do so, but at this point idk. However I also tell myself not to give up, once you give up it becomes true, so try to stay positive, try to keep grinding and try to enjoy your time as much as possible because life is short and there's no point spending it just creating your own misery in your head.
Tldr don't listen to the voices in your head if they're not helping you do anything positive for yourself, practice self love and be happy to be (relatively) healthy and alive.
Things can always be better, and yea it's easy to envy others for the lives they live that you wish you could experience but trust me it can get way worse too.
The new sonic racing game is fun
I just got my first report back for my ML class, I got a 50/100 on it, actually a 70/100 but I fucked up and missed the deadline and turned it in like 6 hours late so I lost 20%
This is the common theme of my life, always making these stupid slip ups and always leaking mistakes always leaking and making errors, always I can never do things perfect. Missing a meeting, waking up late, forgetting a special date, or a birthday party, always something.
There were 3 people who got 100 + the extra credit, I will never be those people, I spent 1 month to research, code, and create a report and scored a mid ass score in my cohort, like again not the worst, not the average, just a bit above but nowhere near the best and this is while I am giving my best.
However take solace in knowing that's totally normal, that's what being mid is, totally normal, not extraordinary, this desire to be extraordinary and special is a you and me problem, nothing else, other people don't even bother to mention it or think about it or make threads about it because it doesn't bother them and they don't loathe their existence.
Let's make a video game tho, we will make a totally avg game which won't be Balatro but it will make some avg sales for the avg work we produce.
I am gonna be done w my classes in Dec so let's do it. I wanna either finish my trade bot and write this final chapter of my life and also publish my game, last things on my bucket list so let's go ya fuckin midwit. 
Ants are nothing alone, but together are mighty and strong and can accomplish great things. Ensemble learning has shown when you combine many weak learners you can form a single strong model, that's what I view ecosystems like this forum, a sort of random forest / hive mind.
Why do you admit you're a midwit or what shortcomings in your life from your viewpoint make you feel this way? Career, relationship, money, achievements?
I had an interview for a position and I was playing fetch with my dog a day later and realized the O(n) solution to their leetcode problem out of the blue. I just told them the moronic n^2 solution.
Someone I trust and resoect very much in my life approached me and told me I was giving them midwit fatigue.
I am definitely a O(n^2) person on leetcode and you know what, most people can't even come up with a solution at all so take some pride in knowing that
I'm sorry I said that, I wasn't really meaning that to hurt your feelings.
The nice thing is that imposter syndrome is a perfectly normal thing to experience and is curable by continuing to work on yourself to improve. We can't be amazing at everything. We have strengths and weaknesses. Some guys will solve a problem in polynomial time that you do in exponential, but those same guys can't last hit for shit in Dota or have the reaction time of a tortoise, or are so socially awkward they can't even talk or communicate effectively so yea, but there are some unicorns I've seen who seem to be good at it all, or at least really excude that aura. Idk, if you always felt like you were one of those guys then you still might be, like you shouldn't care so much about what other people think about you anyway, that's the first sign that you're mid as fuck when you are so easily swayed by external forces.
Would you be interested in working together on my roguelike friend
Im like if a midwit was a person
All the real intellectuals and thinkers (kzz, he who must not be named, casey etc…) have already left the boards. We are all that is left.
It’s likely that none of us are exceptional or will make any great contributions. It’s juvenile to think otherwise. Internet gaming destroyed our brains at a young age, but it doesn’t have to be all doom and gloom. Work hard, be good to your friends and family, and try to carve out some slice of happiness in this life.
Nah.
I want to think of myself as a midwit. In my heart and soul, that's what I believe to be true. But the facts and the evidence say differently. When times get tough, I often impress myself.
