i feel like i’m a pretty numb person with limited emotions so i think it’s really fun when i get “scared” while tripping on shrooms it’s as entertaining to me as going to a haunted house or something like that i also love watching scary movies while tripping cause i get a true feeling of fear lol is anyone else like this?
Starting this post off slow and will come back to update throughout the day as its taken me a solid two weeks to even get my cognitive functioning back to 100%. Even thinking about what to write is very difficult as I recount the experience and the notes I was able to take. I have photos from the session thanks to a travel partner who was present and kept watch over me over the next day but will not be sharing those publicly to protect my identity.
I am currently doing a spiritual retreat for the next few months among people I trust getting guidance, reconnecting with humanity and physically recovering.
Note: My chemistry knowledge is enough to know the dangers of this combination and I entered into this session well aware before hand that I may not survive and was emotionally prepared for that.
This was one of those… if I die… ‘I was already dead to begin with’ sort of sessions…
*** 3 months ago I had a STEMI heart attack during which I was left suffering alone for an unknown period of time in a parking lot without assistance so there’s that also - precusors and precautions ***
Pre-trip preparations over the course of a two weeks prior to the session included a variety of supplements, heavy CBD and THC usage, a strict vegan diet, a 3 day smoothie fast and a 48 hour liquid fast. I will detail more later.
The weekend of the session I committed to a 48 hours personal vigil focused on meditating, reading sacred & inspired texts ( Buddhist, Krishna, Christian, Quran, Torah, The Prophet, The Alchemist, Yogananda, etc ), writing, doing yoga, time in a hot tub & sauna and connecting with my body doing various forms of self care ( clipping nails, cutting my dreads, scrubbing my skin, lots of essential oils, qigong, etc ie; preparing my body if found dead…) and showing this vessel my consciousness resides in … love … you’d be surprised how important that is.
Source - The Tools:
I acquired the psychedelic components of this stack from a trusted “family” source and prepared the MAOI extraction myself using passionflower and black currant as the based. I have extensive experience using MAOIs in combination with tryptamines, psilocybin, LSD, etc but never with MDMA for obvious reason.
Set - Intention:
Setting intention was important as again I knew this could be a one way trip.
So before I began I simply meditated on the concept “Be”…
just “Be” where ever that is I am meant to be… ‘here’ or ‘there’.
Setting - Environment:
Private residence in a remote and isolated area fully stocked the usual with a hot tub, sage, palo santo, a comfortable bed, bathtub, ample fruit & supplements, music, etc. I journeyed alone for the first 4 to 6 hours or so until my friend returned for the MAOI part of the session. I tend to do “sensory deprivation trips” and did so this time as well incorporating:
Blindfold, stethoscope, earplugs, tons of blankets and a space heater in the already warm session room.
My only lighting during the session came from a small candle that stayed lit until we blacked out the room to create a sort of dark silent cave for me.
Thank you and eternal love to the work of the following artist:
Bonobo, Nahko, Trevor Hall, Jai Uttal, Krishna Das, Anoushka Shankar, Reverend Grey, Szjerdene, Sade, Axel Thesleff, Ólafur Arnalds, Greg Haines, duduk players worldwide, and the spirit in these songs in particular :
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qwcM9NPWWtc - Sky World- By Bear Fox performed by Teio Swathe
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3vq6Ot2RiEc - Mahamrityunjaya Mantra
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Om3e4qOxdLs - Jai Jagdeesh - In Dreams
and of course the sound of silence and my own heart beat
So the setting was a safe place to go out of body…
I am going to cut to what happens when you mix MDMA and MAOIs and return back with the rest of my notes and trip report…
You go into hypertensive crisis and swell up like a balloon. Your throat will close up, breathing becomes difficult if not impossible, your airways close and will cycle between vasoconstriction and vasodilation as you struggle to break down everything floating around in your system… this is not a “Recreational trip”
Afib, tach and brady… like real cardiac stop ( my friend has medical experience and can verify I stopped breathing on several occasions )… total loss of consciousness… turning purple etc… :|
This was a christmas eve session and she was prepared and on the same page as me… so if I left a body behind she knew and respected my wishes as I have been suffering and needed visit “Home” to see if I was really needed here anymore…
The entire session lasted about 16 hours.
( I have “tripped” close to 500 times or more on various substances from mushrooms to aya to dmt to cebil seed and have never touch anything in the range of opiods or meth for record )
I began the session like a normal prolonged candy flip where I stagger the LSD doses on top of each other with the intention of 2 to 4 small MDMA redoses during the session ( I only made it to the 3rd redose… )
( the redoses were not intent of “rolling” … but an intentional stress and load on the body with the known side effects and consequences… )
Rough order of dosing:
~75ug LSD liquid ( half drop ) --> ~75mg MDMA ingested --> ~150ug LSD liquid–> ~1.5qts of MAOI extraction from +6hrs to +8hrs --> ~125mg MDMA ingested --> ~50mg MDMA snorted [ last two MDMA doses were with 2 hours or so of each other ]
I stayed well hydrated drank a mix of herbs & juices with large amounts of Kava throughout the experience when able and during the ‘peak’ took about 900mg of Gabapentin over the course of 8 hours with “booster hits” of THC & CBD dabs / natural tobacco / a fairly potent organic indica and “spice shots” which consisted of cayenne, ghost pepper, apple cider vinegar, Himalayan salt, lemon, honey and garlic.
By the time I went “down for the count” sometime around +8hr or so and was no longer mobile… I had wrapped myself up like a mummy, blindfolded myself, inserted the buds of the stethoscope in my ears and opened up just enough space for air to breath and created a sort of “coffin” out of the bed while supporting my breathing and blood flow via pillows under my legs and elevating my head at an angle to allow airflow.
… so… I am not sure what to say about the experience at the moment…
I bled from my mouth and nose… I shit myself … I experienced “nothingness”… not a trip… not “infinity” / “oneness”… there was that for sure… but where I wanted to go… I experienced true death… just … nothingness… no memory…just… I guess dead…? ?? overdose…?
I JUST stopped coughing up black speckled goo a few days ago and my voice has changed… the photo I asked my friend to take of me… showed me what I look like dead as a doorknob… so I now have that knowledge of self…
and then there was the “trip” itself…
yea…
thats about as much as I can write at the moment…
thank you for reading…
dont mix MAOIs and MDMA unless you want this experience and are well prepared & intentioned to not come back …
will write more later maybe
This reads as pure mental illness. No one would recommend you to take an MAOI with MDMA.
I suspect either these chemicals have left you with a completely inflated ego who is on a death drive or you’re trolling hard.
It’s almost as if reading a caricature.
EDIT:
Also seriously, profoundly and cosmically curious: you’re on a spiritual retreat. What spiritual retreat emphasizes you go on a social media site to detail your experience?
You’re a troll. If you did this, your narrowly escaped death.
I don’t think you did this, and you are encouraging someone to do a potentially fatal combination.
? first… I never said anyone recommended me take the combo… I am working on a very specific method for psychedelic euthanasia amongst peers and posted this here because the internet is free… I dont remember you being the King of Reddit…? Your generation causes me grief over your inflated senses of self… you’re likely half my age… at least… at best.
sigh you are also easily offended and feel the need to defend … something…? why? what? who?
I dont know what… but thats all in you …and in your world and in your head in which you play god ( with a lower case ‘g’ ) over those you feel you have some authority or knowledge over. your energy is tiring, self conceited, thin and dim.
you do know that there is a world outside of your screen and your words here are meaningless and a waste of your time right?
your thoughts are just random electrical misfirings in a monkeys skull for all any other sentient being is concerned… but mostly to this sentient being since you decided to share your 2 cents… the “troll” jibberish you are yammering on about doesnt fly in the real world where the rest of humanity lives…
you are nothing but taking up space and time until your ashes return to the earth. and as you do nothing … and contribute nothing… you will return to nothing.
you dont even exist… you are a slowly rotting carcass that makes noises and other than guarding reddit… what are you but an animal with clothes on tapping at a piece of plastic… trying to bolster yourself?
the only thing about your comments that brings me joy is know that you are dead and eventually will be food for worms sooner that you can appreciate. so your incessant ego-fluffing will die along with you.
you dont exist. you are dead. you are not real and when your body stops functioning and your cold corpse is in the ground… you wont even be a memory… as those who knew you or your work die as well… so you will truly cease to have even been when time moves on without your presence…
I’ve probably been dropping lucy before you were born… What you dont understand is that death is a revolving door… there is no escape… you have much to learn…
and for your curiosity… its the kind of spiritual retreat where people prepare to depart and many hear take their leave… its a place for adults… and I am staff researcher here, this is my home.
…so let your cosmic curiosity eat you alive and if you need a wake up call I am sure the currents of our lives will bring our paths to cross
peace to you… troll hunting saviour of the internet.
Rewarding, but it takes a bit of open mindedness and understanding. The friendship can be quite mutually beneficial, but a lot of misunderstandings can present obstacles.
The mutual introvert nature is definitely a potential obstacle. If there is a misunderstanding leading to bad feelings, neither party is likely to mention to the other party until enough resentment is stockpiled. On the side of the ISFJ, it is a long and slow burn process. On the side of the INTP, it is thermal nuclear chain reaction once the critical mass is reached.
Misunderstandings can occur quite easily between an INTP and an ISFJ due to assumptions. An INTP may assume if the ISFJ friend has not spoken, everything is good (green light by default). An ISFJ probably assume a long period of silence as a sign of trouble and start to theorize what may have gone wrong. The key is not to make assumptions.
This means both parties need to learn how to express effectively.
This leads to the second tier of obstacles: communication. Si and Ne are different, very different, ways to get input. Where one focuses on details (ISFJ), the other focuses on patterns (INTP). To overcome this, both parties need to do some work. The INTP needs to be patient and listen in to the details, and confirm with the other party the observed pattern. The ISFJ needs to ask questions if there is insufficient details or if the pattern is too broad.
The next question is, then, the frequency of communication. Time to an INTP is not linear, it is event driven. Naturally, an INTP does not initiate “check in” communications that is highly valued by an ISFJ. This is a matter of culturing a habit to routinely check in and express care. Time to an ISFJ is linear, regular check in is the norm. That’s fine. However, an ISFJ has to understand that an INTP may be in the middle of some big thought exercise and a reply may not be available right away.
What about the content of all this communication? An INTP expresses care by the attitude of “tell me what problem I can help you solve today.” But this may not be what an ISFJ need. To an ISFJ, it is more important to check in and simply listen and validate. Problem solving sometimes conflicts with validation. This means an INTP needs to learn to be empathic first and only problem solve when asked. It is difficult for an INTP n ot to problem solve, but it can be done.
On the other hand, an ISFJ probably has the attitude of “what can I do right now in a concrete way to make you feel good/better.” When an INTP is in deep thought, physical comfort is not important at all! It is important for an ISFJ to understand that an INTP has a wide acceptance of what is considered “within established parameters.” For example, if an INTP is hard at work and may be dehydrated, offering a glass of plain water is probably better than asking the INTP what he/she wants to drink.
So, what is worth all this effort?
To an INTP, an ISFJ friend brings warmth, comfort and a human touch. This friendship can help an INTP better understand the world (that has way more ISFJs than INTPs). The strong introverted sensing (ISFJ are Si dominant) of an ISFJ can also appeal to the nostalgic nature of an INTP. Depending on the depth of the friendship, an ISFJ can also help an INTP process his/her emotions and feelings.
To an ISFJ, I can imagine an INTP friend brings novelty, new ideas, new ways to look at possibilities, and a less pessimistic outlook of the future. An INTP can also be quite utilitarian and handy when it comes to knowledge and problem solving.
My neighbor is the cutest 80 year old man. Super nice, talks a little to much but what old guy doesn’t. We know he smokes weed and drinks, so do my boyfriend and I. Well, a few hours ago I heard a knock at the door and it’s my neighbor. He came by to say hi and to ask if we knew where to get some psychedelics. He would prefer mushrooms or lsd, but if we couldn’t find that he would settle for peyote or mescaline. He said he hasn’t done anything since the 70s or maybe was it 80s. (His words lol) And well he was just in the mood.
That being a genuine iaafr post or a copy paste is indistinguishable
This isn’t about how DARE lied to us or how psychs aren’t actually bad drugs, this is about what it really means to decide to take a psych.
They always say that it opens doors or that you really can’t go back. But what does that mean? Me? I took it as like one of those pictures like Post Malone looking like Bolbi and it’s just something you’re never able to unsee.
It’s true that’s one, albeit small, aspect of it. But it truly means so much more than anyone let’s it off to be.
Taking that tab, that cap, capsule what have you; from that very first instant the tab touches your tongue, you swallow that capsule or finish chewing your cap you’re entire existence is changed.
What no one realizes when they take their first psychedelic is that from that first instant your reality will never be the same. The way you see, think, exist will have changed. It’s subtle, and hard to notice, maybe even impossible, but i guarantee it’s changed.
No longer is your life, reality or existence as simple as it once was. No longer will you ever be able to return to your life before; you are transformed, reborn, unleashed. The door that has the key hole from which you have lived your life has been opened and at that time your new existence begins.
You shouldn’t, by no means, be afraid. You’ve made this choice and it’s nothing more than an opportunity for you to grow and come closer to the universe. But it’s not a choice to make lightly. That door you opened, doesn’t shut the same, it never will. Maybe some day it’ll shut better, but that lock will always be loose, a breeze will always find it’s way in.
So for new users be aware of what it really means when you decide to take the leap; but when you do, embrace it and let it envelope you. Remember “turn off your mind, relax and float downstream”. cheers!
Okay
He’s fucking trolling
I wish to present a novel, or at least uncommon, interpretation of the DMT experience as it relates to our current empirical understandings of consciousness and our observations of physical reality.
The summary of my interpretation: I believe the DMT experience provides a glimpse of what it would be like to exist as a being whose consciousness is wired to accept a very different combination and prioritization of inputs from its neural structure than the beings we know of in our world. DMT temporarily causes a configuration of synaptic/neural activation that has no practical use (note that I’m talking about the experience itself, not the reintegration afterward, which could be potentially useful) to humans or other beings of earth, but may have practical use to beings that exist in a reality with a different configuration, different rules, and different residents. One possible metaphysical implication is that the experience of this configuration should show one of the possible realms where such a configuration would actually be used, if such realms were to exist somewhere in time and space. However, even without such a metaphysical belief, the “simulation hypothesis” I wish to present should hold as viable.
We already know from experiments with psychedelics that psychedelics result in more of the brain activating at once. Google something with the terms “psychedelic” and “brain scan” and you’ll find many studies showing psychedelics are associated with parts of the brain not normally activating together activating, creating more simultaneous connections than is possible in the typical sober, waking state (meditation may provide exceptions, as does REM sleep). The conscious experience on psychedelics, therefore, is an abnormal state unsuited to day-to-day living, but at the same time, one that involves the activation of multiple brain regions that have normal purposes: language processing, image simulation and visualization, memory stores, auditory processing, emotional processing, social processing, etc. On lower doses of different psychedelics, e.g., LSD, psilocybin, mescaline, the brain isn’t so activated so much that sensory input is shut out; in fact, the psychedelic state seems to amplify some aspects of sensory input and make them seem more important, such as with music or poignant sights. When activated beyond a certain threshold, however, with high doses of the above drugs, or a breakthrough dose of DMT, different parts of the brain appear to become activated to the extent that outside sensory input starts to become drowned out. Not only that, aspects of one’s day-to-day personality and thinking and memories also become drowned out, leading to the phenomenon known as “ego death”: the simulations provided by the visual, reasoning, and other relevant centers of the brain become so strong and chaotic that the consciousness seems to inhabit a space of mostly imagination that combines memories and experiences with completely fantastical simulations and produces delirious interpretations that the sober mind could not make, since the brain-state at this point is so far removed from the normal sober brain-state.
There is no confirmed experimental evidence of this, but I posit with reasonably high confidence that the breakthrough DMT dose comprises one of the strongest versions of this simultaneous over-activation of multiple brain regions, far beyond the point that our consciousness has evolutionary reason to be able to deal with.
This is where the possible metaphysical interpretations come in: many people who have experienced a breakthrough dose believe that their consciousness becomes transported to another dimension, a divine one with higher-order intelligences and entities. But rather than transportation, I personally believe that what is happening is an effective simulation of existing in a realm where such simultaneous activation of multiple brain regions, or neural networks, could actually be useful and a part of their existence. If such a realm were to exist, then the entities that exist that use such a higher order of neural networks simultaneously would appear as they do within the DMT breakthrough experience.
One potential metaphysical belief relating to this is that all possible configurations of matter exist. That is, if a configuration can be imagined to hold within certain consistent physical laws, then it does exist somewhere in time and space. If all such realities exist, then beings with neural configurations reached by humans vaporizing or injecting DMT might exist, just somewhere else in time and space, probably outside our observable universe. This is precisely what the DMT experience would give us a glimpse of: what it’s like to exist as such a being with such a neural configuration leading to such a consciousness. The experience of having been there before might be an illusion: perhaps such beings constantly feel as if they are home with such a configuration.
Another potential metaphysical belief is that such realms do not or cannot exist outside of our temporary experiences thereof, but the temporary conscious simulation of such a realm is still clearly possible, since it happens with DMT breakthroughs. I cannot say whether it’s more likely that such realms do or do not exist.
The particular version each person experiences on DMT should be distinct and personalized to the quirks of their brains: some people who lack the brain structures that associated with the feeling of déjà vu wouldn’t experience such a feeling in a DMT breakthrough, and therefore would be simulating an entity that exists without such feelings. Furthermore, the experience would be personalized in time according to which brain regions have been recently prioritized or not prioritized: since serotonin receptors seem to be upregulated or downregulated in response to certain things, any particular instance of a DMT breakthrough might activate the brain differently, leading to potential variations such as “hyperslaps” (bad DMT trips, perhaps involving more receptors being activated in negative parts of the brain), “shut-outs” (inability to break through, perhaps involving not enough or too many receptors being available for activation via DMT at a certain time), or different manifestations of different entities and spaces.
The aftereffects of the DMT experience, which involves a deluge of connections that our normal conscious minds seem underequipped to interpret, might not be as related to the experience of temporarily residing in this conscious space as people seem to believe. Rather than downloading divine knowledge, one might expect the particular configuration of synaptic activation to provide a scrambling of priorities allowing for different perspectives to be more easily reached immediately following the trip, the same way it seems to work with other psychedelics. Furthermore, some new positive interpretations that comprised a fragment of the over-activated experience might be remembered and kept as positive lessons for future thought. My point is that the potential benefits to regular existence derived from such an experience comes less from the totality of temporarily existing as a higher-order entity might, and more from the some of the specific connections within the many simultaneous connections made that comprise that experience. That’s not to say the actual breakthrough experience is any less awe-inspiring, special, or interesting, but simply that we don’t need to invoke divinity or spirituality to explain the experience or benefits.
Thoughts?
Wow dude. This was a great read and I agree, strassman suggested that because of the way dm’t fits into DNA codons you actually become non-human during these periods.
Will be back to comment and read more - or pm me to talk!
For NYE, my friends and I attended the Bassnectar NYE360 show. My wife was our DD and my three friends and I all took LSD. Three of us were experienced trippers, the fourth was about to embark on his first psychedelic journey. We all dropped two tabs at around 10PM. By 11PM Bassnectar had hit the stage and I was tripping harder than I ever have before. I was dissociating, sweating, shaking, and my heart felt like it was about to explode. The tabs were gel pyramid tabs that I had taken before but they had never hit like this.
Bassnectar is hands down my favorite musician and typically his sets are a mix of both heavy and chill songs. This set had no chill. He launched us straight into the motherfucking ether with a one way ticket. I was tripping absolute face and there was a group of people behind me smoking DMT. As the sounds of the music slowed down and the smell of DMT hit me, I found myself in a loop thinking I had just smoked the DMT myself- I hadn’t, but the acid kept making me think I had. I have never been more confused. I was aware that I was on LSD but the effects were so strong and similar to DMT and, when combined with the smell of DMT, I was convinced my JUUL had DMT in it and I had just been steady puffing on dream sand for the past 30 minutes. Anyone who has smoked DMT in the past knows that the indole smell has a tendency to send shivers down your spine whenever you smell it. I have never had a LSD experience that strong. There was nothing left of my reality and sense of self. It was all fading and I didn’t know what to do. I was expecting a light trip with some fun music and lights- the LSD had other plans.
At midnight, the balloons dropped and the crowd started popping them. I didn’t know what the fuck was going on and my idiot monkey brain had a flashback of the Vegas shooting and since Lorin stopped the music to listen to the balloons pop “because they sounded like popcorn”, I thought someone was shooting up the coliseum. Panic set in even more. I asked my wife if everything was okay and she said yes so that kind of helped but not really. I could tell by her expression she saw the fear in my eyes. She has seen me in that state before on psilocybin and we both knew what was coming. She hugged me and tried to calm me down but my mind was racing with fear and panic. After about two more songs, I had had enough of the show. I simply could not handle it anymore. There was this weird political moment in the show with Trump, Ghandi, MLK and all this war themed shit I just didn’t want to see. I was experiencing extreme time dilation and mixed with some of the sounds he was creating, it had me losing my mind. Seconds felt like an eternity. I tried close my eyes and focus on my breath but it just wasn’t working. I knew what was coming next and I didn’t want it to happen in public- full blown ego dissolution.
Here. We. Fucking. Go.
I knew if I just accepted the ego death, I would feel better and the anxiety would fade but I was too afraid of being “that guy” who is passed out in a psych trance at a show and can’t get up to leave once the show is over. I was more worried about my friends and wife having to take care of me and somehow get my out of the arena once the lights came on and it was time to leave. Instead, I fought it tooth and nail. I asked my wife to go walk around with me. That helped aside from seeing police every 15 seconds. Walking and talking with her helped ease some of my anxiety but the acid was still in full force. Just staring at the ground was overwhelming. Beautiful, but overwhelming. I compensated the effects of the LSD with drinking water… A lot of water… bad idea.
The show ends and we meet back up with my friends. We hitch an uber two miles to our car and begin our hour trek back home. I’ve gotta piss BADLY. We try getting into a barcade, but they had just closed since it was 2AM so I just pissed in the alley. After about five minutes in the car, I am hit with an impending sense of doom. I think I am dying. I roll down the windows for fresh air- that makes it worse. I turn up the music- that makes it worse. I turn down the music- that makes it worse. Oh holy mama, here we go. I asked my wife to pull over because I needed water. I didn’t need water, I needed to get out of that goddamn car. I get out at a gas station, piss in the bathroom, and pace in the parking lot. I’m still freaking out because I know I’m about to have to be back on the road again. I was fine as long as I wasn’t riding in a car.
We hit the road again. As soon as we get on the highway, my heart starts racing, OEVs & CEVs going wild, and my hands and chest feel prickly and I am convinced I am having a heart attack. We pull over again probably one or two exits down the road. All I can do is apologize to my friends. We are at the second gas station for about 30 mins and all I am doing is pacing and trying to calm myself down. I pissed three more times in that 30 minute timespan, even managing to piss all over myself. I get laughed at by my friends, but I know they love me and are just trying to get me to feel a bit more lighthearted but it still made me feel more paranoid and I was hit with a sense of shame. I am hugging my friends telling them I love them and that I am sorry for fucking up their night. In reality, I hadn’t fucked up anything aside from a new pair of khakis, but the acid had me paranoid that I was ruining everyones new years eve.
We hit the road… AGAIN. This time I am convinced that I am not making another stop. I made up my mind that I was going to tough out the final 40 minutes so I could just get home and be with my wife, friends, and dogs in a comfortable place. I traded seats with my best friend and sat in the back seat. He gave me his phone to entertain me because I could not find mine and all I could think of to do was search #dogsofinstagram. It was so weird, every photo I saw of a dog was like I watched it age from a puppy to an old dog. It was like I could see the entire life of the dog just from one photo. It helped but the drugs still had me in an absolutely mind-bending experience.
I asked my friend who had never tripped before that night if I could lay on his shoulder. He didn’t mind. He was handling his shit like an absolute champ. As soon as I put my head on his shoulder, I had the thought- “you’ve thought you were dying for the past two hours- you are still here- R E L A X.” As soon as I relaxed, I felt better but was shaking uncontrollably. My friend even chuckled as he rubbed my arm and said, “damn dude, you’re just a bundle of nerves tonight.” Then, I had the thought, “You keep trying to take care of everyone. Let someone take care of you.” As soon as I let go and let my friend take care of me, I felt 100x better and the ego death kicked in. It was actually a really beautiful trip for the remainder of the car ride. It was a 40 minutes I will never forget. After all, I was the guy with the most psychedelic trips under my belt and was supposed to be the sherpa of the evening- HAHAHAHAHA!!! What a joke that was. I kept thanking him and telling him how much he just helped me out. He had no clue what a journey I had just gone through but just having him take care of me took all the pressure off of me to make sure everyone else was okay.
Once we got back home, I felt like my trip had pretty much ended. It went from the hardest I had ever tripped to very mild in a matter of 40 minutes. The anxiety had faded along with most of my visuals. For the rest of the night, we played video games and had a great, relaxing evening. I guess that was what the LSD had planned for me all along. I should have just let it hit me during the show instead of fighting it off. It was a short-lived ego death once I let it happen, but damn was it intense.
The paradox of psychedelics. More trips you take make your “psychedelic ego” bigger, causing you to think you can handle it and be everyone’s sherpa. Sometimes, that is just not the case and you are the one who needs to be taken care of. I had my ego absolutely shattered while sailing down the interstate at 80MPH. It was horrifying and I thought I was on the verge of a trauma-inducing psychotic break, but by the end, I had a wonderful realization that I needed to be shown- friends will care for me in the same way I care for them. After all, that is what friends are for.
Drugs are fucking crazy, kids. Be safe and always remember set and setting. As for me, I will never do psychedelics in public or in a vehicle ever again.
TL;DR:
I took too much LSD at a concert, fought ego death at the concert, had it slap me in the face during a car ride home, pissed myself in a parking lot, thought I was having a heart attack, and was presented with a lesson I needed to hear which was stop trying to take care of everyone and let people care for you when you need it.
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early access occult pinball if anyone wants
Why does it cost 13 dollars
pinball is serious business
shmups not so much
Can anyone help me figure out how to put a curse on Nmagane hanks
Are you guys watching true detective s01 and streaming it on the roragok stream