Valentines day

My mom called me today to ask if I had sent her flowers to her office. I said no I didn't.

I found out the person that sent it was my dad who had died last year in November. I guess he prepaid for it last year before he died and the order was delivered today.

I asked my mom if they were nice flowers. She said yes.

I told my mom to try to smile and be happy that she got such beautiful flowers then I hung up and started sobbing. Happy valentines day.


Aww that's cute but sad.

Hope you're doing better ironstove.


U 2

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That's wild. Hope you're doing alright stove.

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This would be a good post

Thanks guys. Doing better since I let it out. Learned to not bottle shit like that inside anymore. I hope others learn to do the same and realize it isn't weakness to admit to feeling pain. It's human.

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What? I dont feel pain ever lol

How’s life overseas

I'm back in California living at home w my mom. I feel strange coming back to the house after being gone for over 10 years. PTSD flashbacks but I have been vaping weed everyday for like a year straight to try to not have a panic attack and blow my brains out. I am in constant flux between feeling happy with my life and wanting to die because I hate looking forward and seeing all of the stress I have to deal with.

Like, I miss being a kid when I was younger and didn't give a shit about anything and could just have fun everyday and be happy and not think about the pain but as an adult nothing does the trick anymore. Games, drugs, sex, gambling... It's a short high and then back to depression city with dark dark thoughts even when everything is going good, I suddenly feel irrationally awful and like I want to crawl myself into a small dark hole to hide away so i Think there is something wrong with me hahaha.

I'm gonna try to write a book. I wasn't sure what to pick first as my topic so here's what I have so far. What would you be most interested to hear about?

Quitting alcohol and addiction by managing stress from trauma

Day trading. Providing intro, strategies, and fundamentals about mental and emotional discipline. Set of rules to follow, and philosophies on how to be a small fisherman who lives off the waves the whales creates

California utilities and oversight of monopolies, along with the issue of shareholder value driving unchecked profit seeking behavior.

Philosophy on life, depression, purpose, suicide, and so on

Understanding the suicidal mind and how to get back to center living life once you've reached the edge of it.

the cali one, the others seem less unique

You're a ■■■■■■■

will you be my valentine.

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I think you are doing the wrong things in life to be happy and have to look toward more sustainable happiness

This is something that happens as you age. Think of it like - when you were a kid, you could eat sugary cereal and it tasted great and you felt great and everything was good. Beyond a certain age, you eat that same thing and your body feels like shit and you don't feel happy and you're like: Wtf? This used to make me feel good

But the thing is you have to adjust as you age, you need things that sustain more than just a quick high. Satisfying interpersonal relationships/meaningful friendship, life achievements, hobbies where you can work on yourself. Things that allow you to feel fulfilled and growth and like wading into a warm ocean rather than a splash of excitement.

Give it a try you will feel better

You're a ■■■■■■■

Screenshot from 2024-02-15 00-06-40

I am in love with a girl